by Rev. Elizabeth McGlinn
Start a letter to the person you are feeling negative towards, ie: Dear “Spouse”, “Boss”, “Friend”……“I feel angry when you: don’t support me, criticize me, yell at me, etc.” Write out all your feelings and perceptions about the situation, letting all your feelings surface and be felt.
Go back to the top of the letter, cross out the name of the person and insert either Mom, Dad, Primary caregiver, or Sibling. Read the letter again to yourself, seeing where the same scenario and feelings played out in your childhood. Sit with the memories a moment and allow the repressed feelings to surface and be felt (released). Imagine yourself as that child and look at what beliefs you took on after experiencing those childhood situations, ie: I am not supported, loved, wanted, enough, etc. Tell your “Inner Child”, (that part of you that remembers those situations), that you are sorry he or she experienced that situation and took on that negative belief, but that the negative belief they absorbed is not the truth about themselves and they need to change it. Tell your “Inner Child” that the significant family member did the best they could with the skills and knowledge they had, and that they need to forgive them and let go of the resentment and hurt.
Now tell your “Inner Child” the true positive statement about themselves, ie: they are supported, loved, wanted, enough, etc and that you, as their new, healthy “adult”, will always take care of them and tell them their truth.
Go back to the top of your letter, cross out the second name entered and insert the name you use to address your Higher Power, ie: God, Universe, Life Force, Source, Allah, etc. Reread the same letter again. Honestly and openly look to see if your “Inner Child” believes those same thoughts about their relationship with their Higher Power. More often than not, this will hold true.
Again, change those negative beliefs to the positive truths about who they really are. Tell and affirm for your “inner child” that he or she is a spiritual being on a wonderful human journey, always completely connected to their Higher Power, totally cared for (supported), loved, wanted and perfect (enough) just as they are.
It has been said that we get our spiritual identity and perceptions about our Higher Power from our early childhood experiences with the adults in our lives. We are then constantly trying to prove those beliefs true by the experiences we create. If we are experiencing negative in our lives today, it is only because we are still trying to make those negative beliefs true!!! We can truly change our lives by changing our old beliefs and always affirming the truth about ourselves, thus creating positive experiences in our reality, which is what your Higher Power wants for you always!